I can't believe it has been so long!!

We have been busy the last two days. Yesterday my Baby (whom I am so proud of) painted while I made some banana bread without nuts, cause my Baby don't like them. ;) And when I got that done I played on the computer all day. So I guess yesterday wasn't too productive for me. But today we went to Tarkio and did ALL the laundry. It feels so good to have it all done. We went to the laundry mat. It is called "Soaksem Clean". I swear that is what it is called. There was a note from an older lady on one of the dryers griping about the heat on the dryers. My Baby and I was out in the car and my Baby said what it is called and I said without missing a beat I said "well it don't say Dryem dry." My Baby just sat and chuckled. It was funny. While we were up there I finished my Victorian Whimsy Ball. I won't say where it is going yet but I will tell you in a couple of days. Sorry.

Today was Allen Scott's anniversary. He was my oldest son. He passed away when he was 8-months-old. The year that he passed it was the day before Easter. So at 10:10 p.m. tonight it will be exactly 18 years. As they have always told me that it does get a little easier. But I will tell you that before my Baby I was very resentful, with God, with my husband (at the time), my family, and everything. The day that he passed the Easter Bunny came by and took a picture with Allen. Of course, that and more pictures are at my exes. But that day my ex and his brother went fishing. Can you imagine? No neither could I. My sister-in-law, at the time, her name was Fran, and I went to the Childrens' Hospital in Dallas because the doctor was supposed to do chest x-rays of Allen and see if his lungs were collapsed. They were the day before. But after the doctor looked they were alright. At 9:00 p.m. he started letting the Iron Lung breathe for him. And to me that is what I call SUFFERING. And I have always said that the one's I love will NEVER EVER suffer. So I told Fran and the nurses' that I was going to take him out and hold him. Well Fran wanted to have her husband there. And of course the doctor told me that his father had to be there as well. I informed ALL OF THEM that I didn't care where he was and he hadn't been there the whole three months Allen was in the Hospital and he didn't have to be there then. They finally got ahold of them both and they got there at 10:00. The doctor told me that it could take a couple of hours or a couple of days. It took 10 minutes!! I held him, Fran held, and then her husband held him. Everyone was crying, except of course my husband. He wouldn't cry in front of anyone, except his poor mama. Anyway, so today, is the day. And before my Baby, I was VERY RESENTFUL!! I wouldn't know why, but I am not now. I still can't stand the man that I had children with. But, I do love my kids. Of course, my living kids haven't been over to see us since the middle of January. We seen them on Trey's birthday (March 15th) for about 5 minutes or less. Oh well, as I have come to think of it, God took two of my babies and the devil took the other two. I know in my heart that they will come around but I am hoping that I am not too resentful to them. But I know me and I have always said don't make me mad, because I will be mad at you forever. But with my baby's help and God's will I am pretty sure that I will forgive them. But it is going to be really hard.

Anyway, I am so sorry for blabbering and for being so long blogging. I don't know which one more. But I will try to blog more often. Most of the time I am sure it won't be anything but griping about work. But I will try. I hope that you have a great night and thank you for letting me vent. After reading this, I guess I am still resentful, BUT not as bad as I was. Anyway, have a great night and let your Baby hold you real tight. Good night all. Roxi

Happy Spring (A Day Late)

I can't believe how long it has been since I have last posted. I am sorry. I have worked long and hard this week. Last week was the same. The other day at work there was a newsletter that Casey's gives to its workers. It talks about everything about Casey's. The people and what they are doing. One of the little articles in it was from little kids and what they think of marriage. Here is a little excerpt from it.

How can a stranger tell if two people are married? You might have to guess based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. Derrick, age 8.

When is it okay to kiss someone? The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with that. Curt, age 7.

How would the world be different if people didn't get married? There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there? Kelvin, age 8.

And : How would you make a marriage work? Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck. Ricky, age 10.

There were more, but personally those were my favorite. Expecially Kelvin's. I don't know who the kids are, but I just love to hear what they have to say about important things. I really liked that show "Kids say the darndest things." Or whatever it was called.

Anyway, I am REALLY ENJOYING this weather. Today was wonderful. I wanted to SMACK everyone who came in and said "It's so beautiful out there, too bad you are in here." I wanted to hit them and say I woulnd't have to be if you were out there enjoying it INSTEAD of being in here bothering me. But OH NOOOOO not me, I have to be nice and SMILE and SAY HAVE A NICE DAY. A girl up there says to tell them, "Have a nice day, somewhere else." She is in the kitchen, not out front. That is probably why, hmmmmmm. ;)

Anyway, my BABY did the laundry today, cleaned Michaels' room, got Michaels' haircut, and hung the laundry out and brought it in and put them up. He has worked VERY HARD this past week. Thank you very much, Baby. We are hopefully going to bed and I am going to show him how much he means to me. You all have a great night, and I will talk to you tomorrow. Hold your Baby real tight and tell them what they mean to you. Goodnight all. Roxi

Just thinking!! It happens alot!!

My photo album has a WHOLE LOT of pictures of the sky, my kittens (when I was little), and things like that. This picture was of the sunset the other night. I just ABSOLUTELY love it. All the pretty colors and everything. Just beautiful, if I do say so myself. I love the way the streaks were captured. I remember as a teen that I had a camera and in the Spring I would take pictures of the little calves that were running around. Oh, they were so cute. There was a whole box of pictures and when my mom and dad moved my dad thought that it was trash and took it over to where we dumped our trash and the last load he took over he set the whole thing on fire. So I guess, those are toast. Yesterday when my Baby was taking me to work there was a flock of geese right beside the road and then there was a Robin that (no kidding) had some streaks of white on it. Oh my GOSH it was so beautiful, and of COURSE NO CAMERA. So we missed that one. My ex has a WHOLE LOT of pictures that I took at the zoo. I ended up taking about 4 rolls of film when we went up one time. That was just through half of the zoo. I love taking pictures. I don't like to be on the other side of the camera. I don't like the way I look. I never have, sorry Baby. For some reason he likes the way I look. I don't know why. But, anyway, to each his own. But I LOVE the way he looks. ;)

Linda, Bill's sister is on her way up here. She is bringing some things up from his step-dads' and his mom's. I left work early today. Actually, I was going to get off at noon, but since his stepdad isn't coming up then I just got off at 2. She still isn't here yet. She is bringing up 2 of her 3 sons. Nathan and Donald. The other son's name is Ricky he lives down in Arkansas. I have met Nathan a couple of times. I actually knew Donald, didn't know that he was Bill's nephew until we got together. And Ricky I have only met once. I am going to get some pictures to share with you while they are here. We are going to try to go down in April or sometime. I hope, that is. I was thinking the other day that I was going to take off a Saturday, so that way I have a 3 day weekend. I was thinking that April 11th would be a good weekend to take it off. I can't the weekend before because of a softball tournament and the weekend after is a UFC fight. Some freaks in Tarkio actually got up a UFC fight club. You will NOT believe the freaks that go and watch it. Last time they had one, it was crazy busy. I hate those days. For a recession, they spend a whole lot of money on STUPID THINGS. The tickets are running $25 (the last one was anyway) and then they sold beer at the thing at $5 or $7 a pop. So they can't tell me that everyone is just SO POOOOORRRRRR. And then the freaks come in and buy a banana for 84 cents a PIECE. But gripe when hamburger is $2.34 a pound. Or come in and buy lottery tickets to scratch and gripe about the groceries. Makes since right???

Off your soapbox Roxi!! I was thinking about making some whimsie balls for a couple of ladies at work for their grandbabies. They are so cool to make. I will have to take a picture of it. I can't really describe them. Bill's grandma gave me the instructions to make them. So I was thinking of making them. They are really cute and REALLY EASY!! Two things I really look for when doing anything. ;) I was also thinking that I want to make some hot rolls this weekend also. I love making those. They are SOOOOO GOOOOOD, if I do say so. The last rolls just really melted in your mouth. So it really sounds good to me. I actually think that Chicken and Noodles and hot rolls sound really good for supper tomorrow.

But for now, I am getting off of here and getting ready for supper. Have a great night and we will talk to you later. Thank you Jan for your comment. Have a goodnight. Roxi

It has Been a LONG TIME!!

Yesterday, I just laid around and finished embroidering one of my Baby's towels. I still have 5 more. I am working on one more right now that has a pheasant on it. The one that I just finished up had 2 different pictures on it. One was of a fish jumping out of water. And the other had a fish on a sign that said "Fishing... to lake". I just got done washing it. It turned out really well, if I do say so myself. His mom got them for me for Christmas in 2007. I really feel bad that I didn't get them done before, but late then never.

I am NOT going to talk about work today. I am off, and that is all I am going to say about it.

I told my Baby that my job wouldn't take over my life. But UNFORTUNATELY it did. I am sorry, Baby. I never meant for it to happen. You are still number ONE in my life. And you ALWAYS WILL BE!!! Please believe me. PLEASE!!!

My Baby got a new picture last week. It is so beautiful. It has a buck and doe along a pond with a cabin behind them. The guy who made it sold it to him for $20. He made the frame that it is in. I think they are made of barn boards. It matches the other pictures we have on the walls. The other big pictures we have on the walls are both that I painted. They are the paint-by-number kind. One has two wolves on it. One is howling with a full moon shining. That one has a frame that a friend of my Baby's made for him. His name was Dale Wennihan. It is really pretty with the frame. Shortly after he made him the frame Dale passed away. The other one is of a fishing cabin looking out the window at the stream. It has a fish hanging on the wall above the window, with a fly fishing rod, and a net. It is really pretty. That one I made the frame. It isn't as good as the other frames. I didn't really know what I was doing, but I loved making it for him. If I remember right I made that one for his birthday and the wolf one for Christmas one year. I really like making things for my Baby, because he appreciates them so much. I also made him a lap quilt with a cabin in the middle, surrounded by a duck, deer, bears, fish, moose, and a wolf. I hand sewn that with a back fabric with deer, raccoons, and trees on it. It is really pretty. I made Gabriel one for when he was born. If I remember right it has a bear on it. I don't really remember, it has been a while since I seen it. So as you can tell, I like to sew, embroider and just spend time with my Baby, and do other things OTHER THAN WORK AT CASEY'S.

I am going to get off of here and work some more on my Baby's towels. Have a good day. Hopefully, I will get on here with pictures for you later. Take care and have a good night if not. Roxi